100 Hilarious Jokes for Kids Guaranteed to Get Real Laughs
These hilarious kid-friendly jokes, ranging from clever puns to quick one-liners and classic dad jokes, are guaranteed to make children and adults alike burst into laughter.
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Jokes in a Q&A Format
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Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What’s brown and sticky? A stick!
Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!
How do you organize a space party? You planet!
Why can’t you explain puns to kleptomaniacs? They always take things literally.
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One-Liners
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Puns
Children, regardless of their age, often have a natural ability to be amusing without even trying. At the same time, they enjoy humor—particularly simple, memorable jokes they can share with their families.
While you might be eager to nurture their fondness for humor, there’s a limit to how many times you can pose the question, “Why did the chicken cross the road?” Additionally, many jokes lose their charm fast. And, truthfully, some weren’t particularly amusing in the first place.
Fortunately, countless hilarious jokes suitable for children are available. We scoured far and wide to find the best ones that will have your entire family in stitches.
Funniest Q&A Jokes for Children
Here are 25 hilarious family-friendly Q&A jokes from comedian and writer Michael Strecker (author ofThe Young Comic’s Handbook for Crafting Jokes) alongside Rob Elliott, who wroteHilarious Jokes to Make Kids Giggle).
- A: When is the small snake expected to arrive?A: I’m not sure, but he’ll be back soon.
- A: Why was Dracula resting in the incorrect coffin?A: He committed a serious error.
- A: Why is it a bad idea to allow a bear to control the remote?A: He will continue to push the paws button.
- A: Why was the man dismissed from his position at the coin manufacturing plant?A: He no longer made sense.
- A: In which publication was the article about the renowned owl study featured?A: Listed in “Who’s Who.”
- A: Why wasn’t the dental hygienist pleased with her recognition?A: The object in question was a commemorative plaque.
- A: What made the road so anxious?A: The grading process was about to begin.
- A: Why wouldn’t the dinosaur consider using deodorant?A: He had no desire to become ex-stink.
- A: What caused the weightlifter’s distress?A: She exercised using dumbbells.
- Q: Which type of match proves difficult to remove from its container?A: A bout in the wrestling ring.
- A: What fragrance does the Pope prefer most?Pope-pourri.
- A: Why was the pony ordered to stay in his room?A: He kept fooling around without pause.
- Q: How are music and chickens alike?A: Bach again and again—Bach!
- A: What’s the term for a sluggish kangaroo?A: A couch-bound spud.
- A: What makes frogs so joyful?A: They simply consume whatever irritates them.
- Q: What results from combining a bear and a forest?A: You receive fir trees.
- A: Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be called bagels.A: Otherwise, if they flew across the bay, they’d turn into bagels.
- Q: What’s the reason a nose can’t measure 12 inches in length?A: If that were the case, it would be a foot.
- A: What is the reason behind a milking stool having just three legs?A: Since the cow possesses the udder one.
- Q: What’s the result of having two doctors simultaneously?A: Pair-a-medics.
- A: What does the fairy use to repair her wand?A: Dental paste.
- A: Why was the boy bouncing up and down before having his juice?A: The packaging instructed, “Shake well before consuming.”
- A: What types of balls are unable to bounce?A: Eyes.
- A: Why is playing hide-and-seek with mountains impossible?A: Since they’re constantly at their highest point.
- Q: What did the first snowman tell the second one?A: Can you detect the scent of carrots?
Hilarious Dad Jokes Perfect for Children
The exact origin of the phrase “dad joke” remains unclear, but this cherished style of humor has gained widespread appeal, earning a spot in the Merriam-Webster dictionary in 2019. Below are 25 dad jokes guaranteed to delight every member of your family.
- My partner is extremely upset because I constantly get lost and can’t find my way around.I gathered my belongings and left.
- How is holy water created?You heat it intensely until it reaches a vigorous boil.
- The vehicle has an attractive appearance…but the muffler appears worn out.
- I share dad jokes…Occasionally, he lets out a laugh.
- Friend: “I just lost my fish. Could you share something meaningful?”
Parent: “Plethora”
Friend:“Thank you, that truly means a great deal.” - As the meal concludes, the waiter approaches:Is that all?
Parent:No, I’m Norwegian. - You want this pamphlet, bro? Brochure.
- Can you still share a dad joke even if you’re not a father?That’s a social blunder.
- What results from boiling a funny bone?The butt of the joke.
- Kid:*Tumbles to the ground.*
Parent:Is everything okay with you?
Kid: Yeah.
Parent:It’s strange—you ought to be halfway to the left. - Barber: What kind of haircut are you looking for?
Parent: Shorter. - If a chicken coop has two doors, what is the reason behind it?If it featured four doors, it would qualify as a sedan.
- Were you aware that French fries didn’t actually originate in France?They were prepared in Greece.
- Parent:What begins with “w” and finishes with “hat.”
Kid: What?
Parent: Exactly. - Today, my child looked at me and said, “Can I get a bookmark?” At that moment, I couldn’t hold back my tears…For over a decade, my child still hasn’t realized that Brian is my name.
- Kid:Do I appear presentable?
Parent:Using your own vision! - Why is it impossible to hear a pterodactyl using the restroom?Since the urine makes no sound.
- What does a zombie that follows a vegetarian diet consume? GRAAIINNSS!
- A magical canine that performs tricks—what’s its name?A Labrador that performs magic tricks.
- Nearly 80% of individuals confess they struggle significantly when working with fractions.
- What do you name a deer that has no eyes?No clue!
- Kid:“Hey, I was just considering something…”
Parent:“I think I caught a whiff of something burning.” - A termite enters a bar and inquires,“Is the bartender around?”
- What noise does a plane make when it rebounds off the surface?Boeing Boeing Boeing.
- Last night, I visited the seafood disco.I strained a muscle.
Top One-Liners for Children
Remember these witty one-liners for the next awkward silence in a chat. They’re sure to get a laugh from your kid, tween, or teenager!
- 6:30 is, without a doubt, my absolute favorite time of day.
- I adore my furniture, especially my recliner—we have a long history together.
- Parent shifting the car into reverse: “Ah, this brings back memories!”
- Many believe a pirate’s preferred letter is “Arrrrgh,” but in truth, their true affection lies with the letter C.
- I’m buddies with 25 letters of the alphabet, but y remains a mystery to me.
- Passing a graveyard: “Hey, check it out—we’re right in the heart of the dead part of town.”
- Nine months may seem brief, but it can drag on like a pregnancy.
- Let’s go the picturesque way; tell me if you spot Nick.
- This book on anti-gravity is excellent; you won’t be able to stop reading it.
- I purchased a chicken and an egg through Amazon; I’ll keep you updated.
- My friend always tells me, “Look on the bright side—it might be worse. Imagine being trapped in a water-filled hole!” I understand his intentions are good.
- Spring has arrived at last, and I’m thrilled—I watered my plants in celebration.
- Living in Switzerland has many perks, and the flag is definitely one of them.
- Grandpa: I’ve got the classic dad bod.
Dad: For me, it represents more of a paternal role. - Can March come after February? No, though May follows April.
- Pregnant individuals are constantly engaged in bodybuilding around the clock.
- A bug smacks into the windshield: “I doubt it’s brave enough to try that a second time.”
- Time moves swiftly as an arrow, while fruit flies are drawn to a banana.
- I don’t usually like bears much, but I’m starting to warm up to this one.
- Atoms are unreliable—they fabricate everything.
- Enjoy your journey! Catch you again in the autumn!
- The Earth’s rotation is what truly keeps my day going.
- I despise elevators and always choose to take the stairs instead.
- Geology is fascinating, but geography truly takes the spotlight.
- Being an organ donor requires genuine courage.
Funniest Jokes for Children
Puns rank among the silliest types of jokes, making them ideal for both children and adults. They rely on clever wordplay, using multiple meanings or similar sounds of a term to craft amusing punchlines. Below are a few of our top family-friendly picks:
- Unsure whether you’ve picked up on it, but I’m a huge fan of terrible wordplay.That’s exactly the kind of thing that makes me roll my eyes.
- What would you call a computer capable of signing?A small, secluded valley.
- What led to the division of the Roman Empire into two parts?With two Caesars.
- I enjoy humor related to eyes.A healthy cornea is essential for clear vision. This transparent outer layer of the eye plays a crucial role in focusing light. If the cornea becomes swollen, scarred, or damaged, its smoothness and clarity are compromised, distorting vision by scattering light instead of focusing it properly. In such cases, a corneal transplant may be necessary. The success of this procedure depends on the quality of the donor tissue—the healthier the donor cornea, the better the outcome.
- If you struggle with grinding herbs efficiently,then you’re merely squandering thyme.
- I attempted to amuse my spouse by delivering ten consecutive puns in a single sitting.No wordplay in a decade.
- If a child resists resting at nap time,Do they truly bear the blame for opposing repose?
- What do you name a person who lacks both a body and a nose?The answer remains unknown.
- Which language has the fewest speakers worldwide?Sign language.
- If you’re feeling chilly, try standing in the corner.The temperature has reached 90 degrees.
- Have you heard the story of the enchanted tractor?The land transformed into a field.
- How many tickles are needed to get an octopus to laugh? Ten-tickles.
- You’re considered American before you enter the bathroom and after you leave it, but what defines you during the time you’re inside?inWhere is the bathroom? European.
- Few people realize that George Washington concealed his armies within his sleevies.
- Why is the sand damp?Since it’s all about the seaweed!
- Have you heard the story about the clock?The library staff quieted them down for making excessive noise with their tocking.
- A knight who despises battle—what would you name him?Sir Render.
- When does a door cease to be a door?When it’s slightly open.
- When the ocean spots its companions, how does it react?It sways.
- How does the Moon manage to trim its hair?Outshine it.
- What could be more dreadful than a downpour of cats and dogs?Getting a cab.
- What type of tree is small enough to hold in your hand?A solitary palm tree.
- Have you ever wondered why fish thrive in saltwater? It’s because pepper would cause them to sneeze!
- A bear without any teeth—what’s it called?A chewy, gelatin-based candy shaped like a bear.
- A vampire with a runny nose—what’s Dracula like when he’s sneezing?The level of pollen in the air.