160+ Funny Comedians Jokes And Puns To Keep You Laugh !
Comedians Jokes and Punsare the utter way to lighten the mood and come everyonelaughing. Whether you ’ re at a party , with friend , or exactly want a serious laugh , theseclever one-linersand witty puns can turn any position into a comedy display . Fromquick punchlinestoclever wordplay,comedians jokesequal ever ready to bring thelaugh.
Start with a classic like , “ Why don ’ t skeletons fight each other ? They put on ’ t get the guts ! ” or live for apunnytwist with , “ Why make the banana live to the doctor ? Because it wasn ’ t peeling well ! ” Thesecomedian punsare utter for all ages , from kids to grownup , see to it that no ace neglect out on the fun .
Ready for more laughs ? Just recall ,comedian gag and punsbe not merely about thepunchline—they ’ re about the timing , pitch , and , nearly importantly , cause everyone smile ! Go on thejokesoccur , and you ’ ll ever exist the spirit of the party !
Funny Comedians Jokes
1 . What behave the comedian say to the microphone ?
“ I ’ m here to build you laugh—no strings seize ! ”
2 . Why don ’ t comedians ever order mystery ?
Because they can ’ t keep matter under wraps !
3 . How does a comedian outset a conversation ?
“ Let me order you something funny ! ”
4 . What ’ s a comedian ’ s favorite type of math ?
Stand-up geometry , because it ’ s all about angles !
5 . Why did the comedian get to therapy ?
To solve on their punchlines !
6 . What ’ s a comedian ’ s favorite exercise ?
The “ laugh-lifting ” exercise !
7 . Why did the comedian give up their day job ?
Because they be ever getting punch in the gut !
8 . What did the comedian allege after bombing on stage ?
“ Good , at least I ’ m yet serious at failing ! ”
9 . Why make comedian enjoy playing card ?
Because they know how to deal with bad gag !
10 . What ’ s the comedian ’ s favorite snack ?
Puns and chips !
11 . Why live comedians like well picture ?
They always know how to present !
12 . How did the comedian greet the audience ?
“ I ’ ll try not to create you groan… but no promises ! ”
13 . Why act comedian choose the level over a microphone ?
Because it ’ s where they can speak up and deliver !
14 . How does a comedian take care of their voice ?
By doing voice utilization between joke !
15 . What do comedian do when they demand a pause ?
Remove a pun-ch break !
16 . Why live comedian like bicycles ?
They keep spinning new material !
17 . What ’ s the comedian ’ s favorite city ?
Pun Francisco !
18 . What did the comedian say about their bad joke ?
“ It ’ s a no laugh zone . ”
19 . Why are comedian hence serious at comedy show ?
Because they ever bring the theatre down !
20 . What perform a comedian do when they get nervous ?
They laugh it off—literally !
21 . Why act the comedian sit at the spine of the room ?
Because they didn ’ t want to exist the punchline !
22 . What ’ s the comedian ’ sec go-to move ?
Mic drop after a killer punchline !
23 . Why cause comedian savor the sea ?
Because they love waves of laugh !
24 . Why cause comedian make great detective ?
They ever observe the punch in every situation !
25 . How do comedians disclose the ice on stage ?
With a good old-fashioned ice-breaker joke !
26 . Why do comedians prefer comedy clubs ?
Because that ’ s where they can extract the punchline !
27 . How do comedian observe their material fresh ?
They freshen up their punchlines every day !
28 . Why do the comedian begin a promotion ?
Because they present in the workplace and on degree !
29 . What ’ s a comedian ’ s favorite weather ?
Sunny with a chance of punchlines !
30 . What did the comedian say when they couldn ’ t think of a gag ?
“ Looks like I ’ m out of material… for today ! ”
31 . Why cause the comedian recount their gag on level ?
To get the reaction they ’ ve ever wanted !
32 . What ’ s a comedian ’ s favorite drink ?
A stroke of humor with a turn of sarcasm !
33 . Why do the comedian break up with their girlfriend ?
Because they couldn ’ t hand over a grave relationship !
34 . What ’ s a comedian ’ s favorite type of movie ?
A comedy , of course—because it ’ s ever a good joke !
35 . Why cause the comedian always convey a notebook ?
To compose down the funniest thoughts as soon as they hit !
Classical Comedians Jokes
1 . Why don ’ t skeletons fight each early ?
They put on ’ t own the guts !
2 . Why did the scarecrow win an prize ?
Because he cost outstanding in his field !
3 . How do you build a tissue dancing ?
You put a little boogie in it !
4 . Why can ’ t you believe an atom ?
Because they cause up everything !
6 . Why behave the tomato act red ?
Because it saw the salad dressing !
7 . What ’ s orange and sound like a parrot ?
A carrot !
8 . Why don ’ t oysters donate to charity ?
Because they equal shellfish !
9 . Why make the bicycle dusk over ?
Because it was two-tired !
10 . Why don ’ t egg say gag ?
Because they might crack up !
12 . Why did the computer get to the doctor ?
Because it get a virus !
13 . Why equal the math volume sad ?
Because it had too many problems !
14 . Why act the coffee file a police report ?
It come mugged !
15 . Why act the banana go to the doctor ?
Because it wasn ’ t peel well !
Stand-Up Comedians Joke
1 . I ’ m on a whiskey diet .
I ’ ve lost three day already !
2 . I used to be a baker ,
but I couldn ’ t make adequate dough !
3 . I once die to a seafood disco .
I pull a mussel !
4 . Why don ’ t skeletons oppose each early ?
They put on ’ t own the guts !
5 . I put on ’ t trust stairs .
They ’ re ever up to something .
6 . I have a concern of velocity bumps .
But I ’ 1000 slowly getting over it !
7 . I employ to work piano by ear .
But now I use my manpower !
8 . I ’ m reading a ledger about anti-gravity .
It ’ s impossible to lay down !
9 . I have a dog mention “ Five Miles . ”
I walk Five Miles every day !
10 . I got fired from the calendar factory .
All I did was take a day off !
11 . I tell my computer I need a pause .
Now it win ’ t stop direct me Kit-Kats !
12 . I have a fear of elevators ,
but I ’ 1000 taking steps to avoid them .
13 . I went to a seafood restaurant final night .
I attract a mussel !
14 . I used to work as a professional baseball umpire ,
but I couldn ’ t yell it cease .
15 . I put on ’ t have a “ pail list , ”
but my “ pail ” list is hardly to occupy it with chicken nuggets .
16 . I use to bring piano by ear ,
but today I apply my men !
17 . I ’ d tell you a chemistry joke ,
but I know I won ’ t begin a response !
One Liner Comedians Jokes
1 .I used to think I existindecisive, but now I ’ mnot then sure.
2 . Parallel lineshave so much in common — it ’ s a pity they ’ llnever meet.
4 .I feed aclockyesterday — it live realtime-consuming.
5 .I disclose myfingerfinal week , but on the early hand , I ’ mokay.
7 .I have a joke onconstruction, but I ’ m stillworking on it.
8 .My friend didn ’ t understandcloning, so I say , “ That makestwo of us. ”
11 .I ’ m read a book onanti-gravity— it ’ simpossible to place down.
12 .Did you see about thekidnappingat school ? It ’ s fine — hewake up up.
Well Comedians Jokes For Kids
1 . Why make the banana go to the doctor ?
Because it wasn ’ t peeling well !
2 . How cause you do a tissue dance ?
Put a little boogie in it !
3 . Why live the math book sad ?
Because it get too many problem .
4 . Why act the scarecrow win an laurels ?
Because he exist prominent in his field !
5 . What do you call cheese that isn ’ t yours ?
Nacho cheese !
6 . Why don ’ t skeletons struggle each early ?
They put on ’ t own the guts .
8 . Why be the computer cold ?
Because it left its Windows open !
9 . Why don ’ t eggs tell gag ?
Because they ’ 500 crack each early up .
10 . Why did the chicken join a lot ?
Because it hold the drumsticks !
11 . What ’ s orange and sound like a parrot ?
A carrot !
12 . Why cause oxen have on bell ?
Because their horns put on ’ t study !
13 . What make you shout a dog magician ?
A labracadabrador !
14 . Why do the cookie die to the hospital ?
Because it felt crummy !
15 . Why can ’ t Elsa hold a balloon ?
Because she ’ ll permit it go !
Family And Friends Comedians Jokes
1 . Why do Dad make for a ladder to dinner ?
Because he require to raise the steaks !
2 . What did Mom say when the cookies disappeared ?
“ This smells like a crumby position ! ”
3 . Why did the brother make for a flashlight to school ?
He need to equal the brightest in category !
4 . Why act Grandma always hold a ruler ?
To measure how much fun everyone exist having !
5 . Why did the cousin sit next to the fridge ?
He want to cost cool !
6 . Why do uncle tell the same gag every time ?
Because practice makes perfect…ly annoying !
7 . Why was the sister always calm ?
Because she know how to chill with her sib-lings !
8 . Why did Dad gag during a grave talk ?
Because he just couldn ’ t aid himself—it equal pun-ishment !
9 . What make the aunt say when the soup talk ?
“ Well , that ’ s souper unfortunate ! ”
10 . What do you get when cousins tell joke together ?
Twice the laughter !
11 . What cause papa enjoy to serve at BBQs ?
Grill the food… and everyone with joke !
12 . Why live household road trip always funny ?
Because soul always repel everyone crazy !
13 . What ’ s a household ’ s favorite type of gag ?
A pun-demic ! Because everyone catches it !
Comedians Gag About Relationships
1 .I told myspouseI neededspace… so they gave me thesilent discussion.Operate !
2 .I guess I wasromanticuntil I realizedlighting candlesjust meant we forget to pay theelectricity bill.
3 .Relationships be50/50— you cause thedishes, and I guess to beasleep.
4 . Dating appsare great — if you delightpronounce peoplelike you ’ re on areality display.
5 .I recount mygirlfriendshe should embrace hermistakes… thus shehugged me.
6 .Myboyfriendand I live like asoftware update: he keepsimprovingwhile I ’ m justignoring notifications.
7 .Everyrelationshiphasarguments. Ours are simplyprofessional-level tournaments.
8 .I finally found theutter soul… but they guess I ’ m “too into dad joke. ”
9 .Myspousesays I ’ m tooclingy. I just desire tohold their hand…all the time.Forever.
10 .We have afirm relationship— mostly because neither of us wants to initiatedating again.
11 .They readcontrary attract. That ’ s why I ’ mneat, and they ’ re abeautiful disaster.
12 . Enjoyis all aboutcompromise— like look out afilmneither of us wanted to see .
Comedian Jokes About Work
1 . Why act the position worker sit on the copy machine ?
He wanted to cause some self copies !
2 . Why don ’ t secrets last at the office ?
Because the cubicles are always eavesdropping !
3 . Why make the boss get glasses ?
To improve his occupation sight !
4 . Why did the keyboard go on holiday ?
It needed to run the typing pressure !
5 . Why did the coffee file a complaint ?
Because it exist ever be mugged !
6 . Why did the stapler reveal up with the tape ?
Because it couldn ’ t hold it together anymore !
7 . Why was the pencil late to form ?
It couldn ’ t trace itself out of bed !
8 . Why did the computer apply for a raise ?
It hold also many tabs capable !
9 . Why cause the worker remove a ladder to solve ?
He was ready to go up the corporate ladder !
10 . Why did the intern bring a blanket ?
Because it was a chilly response !
11 . Why cause the phone move to therapy ?
It couldn ’ t handle the calls anymore !
12 . Why don ’ t meeting ever cease on time ?
Because time checks out early !
13 . Why was the clock hire at the company ?
It equal ever on time !
14 . Why did the whiteboard feeling wiped out ?
It get a sporting slate every day !
15 . Why did the accountant quit ?
Because everything didn ’ t add up !
16 . Why cause the janitor win employee of the month ?
He was sweep the competitor !
17 . Why behave the paper time get encourage ?
It ever held thing together !
Comedians Jokes About Food
1 . Why behave the tomato act red ?
Because it hear the salad dressing !
2 . Why don ’ t egg tell each early secrets ?
Because they might crack up !
3 . Why don ’ t bananas ever feel lonely ?
Because they always hang out in cluster !
4 . Why make the grapes quit in the middle of the road ?
They ran out of juice !
5 . Why did the pancake apply for a chore ?
It wanted to pile up some money !
6 . Why was the chef so curious ?
Because he ever own a zest for living !
7 . Why did the apple stop in the middle of the race ?
It run out of center strength .
8 . Why act the salad blush ?
Because it saw the ranch dressing !
9 . Why don ’ t you fight with a sandwich ?
Because it ’ s ever packing something !
10 . Why cause the jelly always win races ?
Because it knew how to jam !
11 . Why exist the orange then serious at fun ?
Because it had a circle of pulp !
12 . Why don ’ t tacos faith anyone ?
Because they remember everyone cost nacho friend !
13 . Why make the broccoli live to therapy ?
It own too many .
14 . Why behave the donut move to school ?
To become a little more glazed and confused !
15 . What ’ s a cheeseburger ’ s favorite song ?
“ Sweet Bun of Mine ” !
Comedian Puns
1 . Stand-up comedy :the only job wheredying on stageexist still portion of the act .
2 .I asked my dog what ’ sec funny—he order, “Paw-sitive energy !”
3 .I once make a set in a bakery—interviewequalcrumby, but I arise to the occasion .
4 .My fridge attempt stand-up once—it bombbecause ofcold delivery.
5 .I require to live a comedian , but mytiminglive off… ever .
6 .I ’ m great at clean jokes—Iwashevery tune before delivering .
8 .I told achemistry gagat a club—it got areaction!
9 .I asked the interview if they likepuns—they said it waspun-ishment.
12 .My comedy is so fresh , it needs to be prevent in thecrisper drawer.
13 .I did a joke aboutbeekeeping—peoplebuzzedwith laugh .
14 .I wanted to be apun comedian—turns out I arrest it .
15 .My joke aboutWi-Fibegin a seriousconnectionwith the crowd .
17 .My comedy ’ sec like aboomerang—if it flop , it come back to hit me .
Conclusion
Comedians jokeandpunsare atimelessstyle to lendhumorto any affair . Whether you ’ re cracking agagwith friends , lightening themoodat study , or just look for something to build yousmile, these clever lines never fail to hand over .
Punsandpunchlinesare a great reminder thatlaughis thebest medicine, and a smallhumorcan go a long means in brightening soul ’ secday. So , the next time you ’ re in need of a goodgag, simply extract out a few of thesehilarious comedian jokesand keep thefunrolling !