175 Hilarious Dad Jokes to Irritate Your Friends and Family With

Dad jokes for 2025 that will genuinely make you laugh! Check out these side-splitting, cringe-inducing puns and quick quips ideal for children, grown-ups, or anyone in search of a good giggle.

They’re delightfully campy, wonderfully over-the-top, and never fail to amuse me (no matter how cringe-worthy they may be).

I couldn’t care less if they make you roll your eyes or sigh—I’ll gladly embrace any cheesy joke or witty remark that falls under dad humor. Seriously, who’s too sophisticated for knock-knock jokes and playful puns?

Additionally, they rank among the top sources of amusement, whether your goal is to have friends in stitches or elicit playful groans from family members.

Though many in your life may groan at a dad joke, it’s still worth collecting these comically cheesy gems. Their humor lies in how painfully unfunny they are, giving you even more incentive to save them for future use—perfect for tormenting your friends with endless cringe.

If you’re an aspiring dad aiming to sharpen your punchlines or simply searching for the top dad jokes of 2025, look no further. This collection is precisely what you’re after.

PS – I’ll avoid adult humor and keep things appropriate for kids, so your child can read it too for some fun!

Fresh Dad Jokes for 2025

A dad joke reveals its true nature the moment it’s delivered—that’s when you know it’s officially a dad joke.
Where do highly intense individuals reside? In tents!
Hey, are those summer cows? [Someone inquires, “What exactly are summer cows?”]. Actually, some are black while others are brown!
Why was the coffee bean given a promotion? It was steeping with promise.
Why do trees avoid gossip? Because they can’t resist sticking their leaves into everything.

[While passing by a cemetery] What’s the total number of deceased individuals buried there? Every single one!
Why are pastries such unreliable companions? They constantly bail on you.
Want to hear a joke about skipping rope? Forget it—let’s just skip it.
Why did the wind feel ashamed? It let one rip in front of the whole crowd.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Car go. Car go who? Nah, dude, Owl go who—Car go Beep Beep.
A fish without eyes is known as a fsh.

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!

What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!

How do you organize a space party? You planet!

Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!

What’s brown and sticky? A stick!

Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems!

How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!

Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything!

What’s the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty!

Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!

I’ll need to save all these dad jokes in my dad-a-base.
A man was once given a bowl of rabbit stew and remarked, “Pardon me, but there’s a hare in my stew.”
At what point does a door cease to be a door? When it’s slightly open!
Why is Usain Bolt referred to as a fruit? It’s simple—just take a look at how that Man-go!
Why was the goose able to cross the road more easily than the chicken? Because it knew how to honk!

How did the cybercriminal evade the FBI? He used ransomware!
Kid: Hey Dad, did you get a haircut?
Dad: Nah, I had a whole lot of them trimmed instead.
How do you treat an ailing pig? With oinkment!
Customer: Should the milk be placed in a bag?
Dad: No, the jug is fine.
Why did Winnie the Pooh get burned while removing pizza from the oven? Because he grabbed it with his… bear… hands.
Dad: Oh my! A train just went past this spot.
Person: How can you tell?
Dad: I can see its tracks.
I discovered a book capable of resolving half my issues, which is why I purchased two copies!

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!

What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!

Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.

What’s brown and sticky? A stick.

How do you organize a space party? You planet.

Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.

What did one wall say to the other wall? I’ll meet you at the corner!

Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything!

What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!

What do you name a fly that doesn’t have wings? A walk.
What do you call a pig that has three eyes? Piiig.
What do you name a deer that lacks eyes? No eye deer.
What do you name a lifeless deer that has no eyes? Still no eye deer.
What do you name a guy who lacks both a torso and a nose? Nobody nose.
*Shifts the car into reverse* “Ah, this brings back memories.”

Were you assembled the wrong way up? Because your feet smell and your nose runs!
What’s the term for seagulls soaring above the bay? Bagels!
Just found out I have color blindness. The news hit me out of the blue!
What’s brown and sticks to things? A stick!
What do you name a canine with magical abilities? A labracadador!
*Opens fortune cookie* Kid: “What does it say, dad?” Dad: “It reads, ‘Help! I’m trapped inside a fortune cookie factory!’”

The Funniest Dad Jokes for Children

What nickname does a dentist give to X-Rays? A Tooth Pic!
I once dreamed I was drifting in an ocean of orange soda—a vast Fanta sea.
What’s the name for a donkey with three legs? A wonky.
What do you call cheese that doesn’t belong to you? Nacho cheese!
Have you heard about the award-winning scarecrow? He was exceptional at standing in his field!

What letter do pirates love the most? It’s the C!
Knock knock! Who’s there? Amos. Amos who? It’s a mosquito!
Knock knock! Who’s there? Anna. Anna who? Anna-nother mosquito bite!
Knock knock! Who’s there? Yetta. Yetta who? Yet another mosquito!
Where can you locate a legless tortoise? Exactly where you last placed it.
“Hey fridge,” said the mayonnaise, “shut the door—I’m getting dressed in here!”

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!

What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!

How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!

Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!

What’s brown and sticky? A stick!

Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space!

Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

How do you organize a space party? You planet!

Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up everything!

I’ve got a joke about a ghost train you won’t even notice until it smacks into you… And then—boom.
Ever heard that joke about the Michael Jackson track? It’s an absolute thriller.
Alright, I’ll confess. Calling the dog ‘Shark’ and bringing him to the beach probably wasn’t my brightest move.
I’ve got a joke about a snapped pencil… but there’s no point to it.
When is the ideal time to visit the dentist? At tooth hurty.

I funded my college education by working at a bakery, where my main task was kneading dough.
Two fish are inside a tank. One looks at the other and asks, “How do you operate this thing?”
What was the price of the chimney? It went through the roof! Another response: The house covered it.
Why did the elephant decide to cross the road? Because the chicken wasn’t working that day.
Kid: You’ll never believe what we saw today!
Dad: Probably everything you laid your eyes on.
What’s the term for a Frenchman wearing sandals? Philippe Philoppe.
What do you offer an ailing bird? Tweetment.
Dad: Do you want to hear a ghost joke?
Kid: Sure!
Dad: That’s the spirit!
Imitation and plateaus share a key similarity: both represent the greatest expressions of admiration.
Elevator jokes are my favorite—they operate on multiple levels!
Math jokes are fantastic, though I estimate the majority of people won’t understand them.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Have you really forgotten me so soon?

Why did the janitor shout when they leaped from the closet? Supplies!
Dad: What can fly, swim, and also give solid advice?
Kid: I don’t know—what?
Dad: A duck! *Tosses ball your way*
I’ll go change the baby… but just a bit since I actually enjoy how he is right now.
Kid: I wish I were a sandwich (or another kind of food).
Dad: Well, you certainly don’t resemble one.
What do you name a dog that has no legs? No matter what you call it, it won’t come to you.

Silly Dad Jokes

Why don’t ants fall ill? It’s because they possess minuscule antibodies.
Why does Peter Pan soar through the air endlessly? Because he Neverlands!
Why do bicycles end up lying sideways? Because they’re two-tired.
Perhaps a joke about art? No, that’s too clever.
I once met a farmer who stood out in his field!
What’s the term for a frog parked unlawfully? Toad!
How many tickles are needed to get an octopus to laugh? Ten-ticles!

Hilarious Dad Jokes to Brighten Your Day

Why did the rooster gaze at the lettuce? Because the chicken spotted a salad!
Why don’t crabs ever donate to good causes? Because they’re too shellfish.
During dinner last evening, I believed I noticed my father gagging. In the end, it was simply another instance of a dad choking!
Why don’t gladiators ever frown? Because they’d turn into Sadiators!
Dad at breakfast: I’ll have bacon and eggs, please.
Waiter: How would you like your eggs prepared?
Dad: How should I know? I haven’t even seen them!

Dad: “Cool shirt, is that made of felt?” Kid: “Nope.” Dad: Brushes his hand against the sleeve and grins, “Well, it is now!”
Dad: Are there any holes in your socks?
Kid: No.
Dad: Then how did you manage to put your feet inside them?
If a child refuses to nap, could they be accused of resisting a rest?
A magician strolled along the sidewalk before stepping into a grocery shop.
“Do you have a table booked?” Dad asked. “Yes, but I believe we’ll dine here anyway.”

I can’t believe playgrounds still have monkey bars. There are kids around… do we really think it’s appropriate to let monkeys drink where children play?
Why did six feel scared of seven? Because seven ate nine!
Why do all the Norwegian navy ships have barcodes on them? It’s so they can easily scan-da-navi-an when returning to dock!
Kid: Hey Dad!
Dad: Hay is for horses, I’m a person!
What do clouds have on under their trousers? Thunderwear.
share the same middle name, “the.” Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh are linked by this distinctive title in their names.
share the same middle name
I adore my furniture. My recliner and I have a long history together.

Classic Dad Jokes never fail to deliver a mix of groans and chuckles. These timeless quips, often pun-filled and deliberately cheesy, are a staple of paternal humor. Whether it’s playful wordplay or predictable punchlines, they remain endearingly corny. Passed down through generations, Classic Dad Jokes continue to bring lighthearted amusement to family gatherings and everyday moments alike.

*On New Year’s Eve* Catch you in the coming year!
Want to hear a joke about pizza? Forget it…it’s way too cheesy.
Want to hear a joke about a wall? Forget it—you’ll never get past it.
What is the total volume of a pizza that has a radius of ‘z’ and a thickness of ‘a’? Pizza!
Why do fish prefer salt water? Because pepper water would cause them to sneeze!

Where was Mickey Mouse when the power went out? In complete darkness.
What distinguishes a well-dressed man on a bike from a shabbily-dressed man on a single wheel? Their clothing!
I never liked facial hair at first, but over time, I started to appreciate it.
Disney conducted a poll. The results revealed that six out of the seven dwarves are not Happy.

Witty Father Humor

How can you tell if your clock hasn’t had enough to eat? It takes four extra seconds.
Devouring a clock takes an enormous amount of time.
Why should you be wary of an atom? Because they constitute all matter.
Creating a belt from watches is an inefficient use of time.
What was the critic’s remark to the artist upon seeing his painting of a steak? “It’s a rare medium, well done.”

What’s the nickname for the little soda cans in Minnesota? Minisodas!
Knock knock! Who’s there? Technician for fixing doorbells.
What do you name a fish dressed in a tie? What? SoFISHticated!
An employee accidentally tumbled into a tank of chewing gum, and his supervisor arrived to give him a stern scolding!
Have you caught wind of corduroy pillows? They’re all the buzz right now!

Puns from Dad

There was a kidnapping at school—no need to worry, though, because the kid woke up.
What sets a pun apart from a dad joke? Puns aren’t always obvious.
What should you do when you spot an astronaut? Park your car there, dude!
Why are blind individuals unable to consume fish? Because it’s considered seafood.
Watch out near evergreen trees… they’re constantly shady.
Giraffes can reach heights of up to 18 feet, though they typically stand around 4 feet tall.
A storm that gathered eggs and milk over the Rockies is now pummeling the Midwest!
I dislike elevators, so I’m making an effort to steer clear of them!

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!

What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!

How do you organize a space party? You planet!

Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!

What’s brown and sticky? A stick!

Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.

How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!

What’s the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty!

Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired!

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!

I struggle with feelings of inferiority. Unfortunately, even that isn’t something I excel at.
Geology is fascinating, but geography truly takes the prize!
Why did the onion become a musician? Because he was a total rap-scallion!
What’s crimson and has the scent of blue paint? Red paint.
Velcro, what a total scam!

How many bones does a hand contain? Just a handful!
What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck.
At what point does a joke turn into a dad joke? When the reaction is nothing but groans!
I’ve never had faith in stairs—they’re constantly scheming something.
Ever heard of Orion’s Belt? Quite the spacious midsection, right?

Dumb Father Jokes

Kid: Dad, I can’t eat anymore.
Dad: Hey “can’t eat anymore,” nice to meet you—I’m dad!
What’s crimson and harmful to your teeth? A brick!
What is Big Ben’s surname? It’s Isabel!
Want to hear a construction joke? Forget it—I’m still building it.
What’s invisible and yellow? Definitely not bananas.
A petite psychic recently escaped from jail—now there’s a little medium on the loose!
What caused the produce boat to go under? An excess of leeks!
I once shared dad jokes with my father, but he asked me to quit.
Kid: Dad, could you prepare a sandwich for me?
Dad: Poof! Now you’re a sandwich.
They installed those fences around cemeteries since folks are practically dying to get inside!

A guy came to my door requesting a modest contribution for the neighborhood swimming pool… So I handed him a glass of water!
Did you catch the joke about the enchanted tractor? It rolled down the street and transformed into a field.
A horse and a cow stand in a field, gazing at the sunset. A pig approaches them and inquires, “Have you heard about the Farmer’s Daughter?” The horse exclaims, “It’s a pig that can talk!”
Burglars infiltrated a police station and made off with every toilet seat. Authorities admit they have no leads to pursue.
What kind of music does a wind turbine enjoy most? Apparently, they’re really into heavy metal!
Kid: I’m about to hop into the shower!
Dad: That definitely sounds risky!
Why did the hipster scorch his tongue? He sipped his coffee before it was trendy!

Silly Animal Puns for Fathers
Amusing Creature Quips by Dad
Lighthearted Wildlife Humor from Pop
Playful Dad Humor Featuring Animals
Fatherly Laughs with Furry Friends

Dad: Check out that flock of cows!
Kid: Don’t you mean a herd of cows, dad?
Dad: Obviously, I’ve heard of them—there’s a whole flock right there!
What do you name a dinosaur with poor vision? A doyouthinkhesaurus.
A weasel strolls into a bar… The bartender inquires, “What can I get you?” “Pop!” says the weasel.
What distinguishes a piano from a fish? A piano can be tuned, but you can’t tune a fish!
What do you name a cow that has no legs? Ground beef!
Why does a chicken coop feature two doors? With four, it would turn into a chicken sedan!
What do you name a hen that can tally her own eggs? A mathema-chicken!
What do you name a hippo with only one leg? A hop-po!

Sports-Themed Dad Jokes

Ever wondered why scuba divers exit the boat backward? It’s simple—if they went forward, they’d still be inside the boat.
Mike Tyson told his girlfriend, “You’re absolutely ear-resistible!!!”
Why did Cinderella get removed from the basketball team? Because she fled from the ball.
How much did Tom Brady spend to get his ears pierced? A Buck-An-Ear.
Why did the small ghost get invited to play on the football team? Because they were looking for a bit of team spirit!

Ever hear about the football player who used to be a priest and cost his team the match? He just couldn’t manage a conversion.
How can we tell if football referees are content? It’s simple—they whistle during the game!
Where can footballers shop for fresh uniforms? New Jersey.
Why do the Chicago Bears struggle to win playoff games? When the postseason arrives, they seem to go into hibernation.
Wearing glasses during football is not advisable due to the physical nature of the game.

Poor Father Humor

Son: Dad, could you tell me what an eclipse is?
Dad: No, kiddo.
Two antennas tied the knot recently. The wedding itself was simple, but the reception was absolutely amazing.
Child: “I need something to eat.”
Father: “I’m your father, pleased to meet you!”
What sets in-laws apart from outlaws? Outlaws are actively sought after.
Dad: What’s the name of that nut with the curve?
Person: Cashew?
Dad: Gesundheit! But what’s that bent nut called?

*On a road that runs by a graveyard* The cell service will drop any minute—we’re about to hit a dead zone!
What letter does a pirate love the most? RRRRRRR!
What’s a pirate’s most cherished letter? It’s the letter P! Without it, they’d just be irate!
Three guys strolled into a bar… you’d figure the last one might’ve dodged it!
When I was younger, the sole method I had to earn cash was by recycling flattened cans. It was SODA pressing!
Farm dad: “If we don’t cross paths down the road, I’ll catch you out in the field.”
Dad: One of us is secretly an owl.
Kid: Which one?
Dad: *Glares with suspicion*

Grace Moser is the creator and writer behind Chasing Foxes, offering insights to empower women in building a fulfilling life through both significant and everyday choices. Since 2016, she has embraced a nomadic lifestyle, journeying across the globe with her husband, Silas, while documenting their adventures. Her expertise in travel and lifestyle has been featured in prominent publications like Business Insider, Glamour, Newsweek, Huffpost, and Apartment Therapy.