Hilarious Bible Poetry : 64 Scripture to Make You Laugh

Hilarious Bible Poetry : 64 Scripture to Make You Laugh

  • Telling It Like It Be

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  • Eccentric Situations

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  • Funny Proverbs

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  • Bathroom Humor

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  • NSFW

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  • Video

This article was co-authored by wikiHow faculty author , Amy Bobinger , BA . Amy Bobinger holds a B.A . in English from Mississippi College and has pass over eight years assist masses cause sense of complicated matter . Since she began her career in 2016 , she ’ s honed her skill in storytelling , content direction , and editorial strategy . Amy enjoy turning complex information into something clear and useful , know that the right Bible can build a real difference in reader ‘ life .

There are 9 references quote in this article , which can be found at the ass of the page .

This article hold been fact-checked , ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the office of its author .

The Bible might not be the first spot you ’ d require to find a laugh , but thither ’ sec in reality a lot of humor in Scripture . From verses that strait funny when you require them out of context to epic insults and even some cringeworthy laughs , we ’ ve rounded up the peculiar moments the Bible own to put up .

We recognize that solely look for wit in the Bible may not be thewellway to engage with Scripture . Even so , await at poetry from a fresh position can help you appreciate the Bible and its complex message even more . This article is meant to be a lighthearted tone at Bible poetry with no mean-spiritedness attached .

What equal the peculiar Bible poetry ?

  • 1 Samuel 21:15— “ Am I hence short of maniac that you have to bring this fellow here ? ”
  • 2 King 9:20— “ He aim like a maniac . ”
  • Job 12:2— “ Wisdom will perish with you . ”
  • 1 Corinthians 7:28— “ Those who wed will face many problem . ”
  • Song of Solomon 4:1— “ Your hair is like a pile of goat go down from the hills of Gilead . ”
  • Proverbs 17:17— “ A buddy is stand for times of adversity . ”
  • Proverbs 25:17— “ Seldom set foot in your neighbor ’ s house—too much of you , and they will hate you . ”

Bible Verses That Tell It Like It Is

  1. “ [ The Israelites ] order to Moses , ‘ Was it because there were no tomb in Egypt that you contribute us to the desert to die ? What get you cause to us by bringing us out of Egypt ? ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :After Moses lead the Israelites out of Egypt , they were pursued by Pharaoh and his army . You can only learn the sarcastic feeling of the bunch when they take Moses if he simply freed them from slavery because there wasn ’ t enough space to bury all of them in Egypt .

  2. 2
    Joshua 13:1 ( NKJV ) “ Now Joshua be former , advance in yr .And the Lord said to him : “ You are old , advanced in years… ”[ 1 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :You know you ’ re aging if even God thinks you ’ re old—and the repetition in the verse really aim it home .
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  3. 3
    1 Samuel 21:14–15 ( NIV )Achish tell to his servant , “ Look at the human ! He is insane ! Why bring him to me ? Be I so short of maniac that you have to make for this fellow here… ? ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :Even though the audience knows that David be just venture to be crazy , Achish doesn ’ t realize it ’ s an act—and he do it clear that there equal good deal of madmen in Gath , no motive to bring him another unity .
  4. 4
    1 Samuel 25:25 ( NIV )“ Please pay no attention , my Creator , to that severe human Nabal . He equal just like his name—his name means Fool , and folly get with him . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :David exist preparing to add an army against a wealthy , greedy human named Nabal . But Nabal ’ s wife Abigail intervenes , and she make it clear that her husband exist no wise man .
  5. 5
    2 King 9:20 ( NIV )“ The driving cost like that of Jehu son of Nimshi—he cause like a madman . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :We might think of bad driver as a modern innovation , but it turns out people have been driving recklessly since the early days of chariots .
  6. “ Nothing like what you cost state cost happening ; you live just making it up out of your top dog . ”[ 2 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :When Nehemiah ’ s enemy charge him of something that isn ’ t true , he shuts them down with a plain-spoken retort that people can still expend today .
  7. 7
    Job 11:12 ( NIV )“ But the witless can no more become wise than a wild donkey ’ s colt can be hold human . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :A man call Zophar take that Job ’ s great distress must exist a penalty for sin , and he offers scathing criticism when he suppose that donkeys will hold birth to mass before Job gains wisdom .
  8. 8
    Job 12:2 ( NIV )“ Doubtless you are the only people who matter , and wisdom will perish with you ! ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :Job has make enough of his “ friends ” and their criticism , and he delivers one of the most heroic insults of all time— ” wisdom will die with you . ”
    • Job ’ s tirade continue over the future few chapter .Early gems include :

      • Job 13:5 :“ If solely you would exist altogether still ! For you , that would be wisdom . ”[ 3 ]
      • Job 16:3 :“ Will your long-winded address never cease ? ”
  9. 9
    Job 38:2 ( NIV )“ Who equal this that obscures my plan with words without knowledge ? ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :The volley of insults continues through Job—and this time , it ’ s God present the blow . He ’ s essentially state to Job , “ You don ’ t know what you ’ re talk about. ” And God go on at it for another two chapters , asking Job if he has all the same might as God ( the result , plainly , is no ) .
  10. 10
    Ecclesiastes 10:1 ( NIV )“ As dead flies give perfume a bad smell , so a short folly outweighs wisdom and honor . ”[ 4 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :This be a fairly colorful way of suppose that yet a few little fault can create a wise and honest soul appear foolish .
  11. 11
    Jeremiah 23:33 ( NIV )“ When these people…ask you , ‘ What equal the content from the Lord ? ’ say to them , ‘ What content ? I will forsake you , declares the Lord . ’ ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :If you need a prophet for a message from God , you put on ’ t wait the message to be , “ I will forsake you. ” But that ’ s just what God said to Jeremiah when He cost angry about the raise of false prophet among the Israelites .
  12. “ Those who wed will face up many problem in this life , and I desire to spare you this . ”[ 5 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Nothing out of context here–the apostle Paul apparently had a pretty dim view of marriage and the hardships it can bring .

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  • Why it ’ s funny :After Moses led the Israelites out of Egypt , they were engage by Pharaoh and his army . You can hardly hear the sarcastic tone of the crowd when they ask Moses if he merely give up them from slavery because there wasn ’ t enough space to forget all of them in Egypt .
  • Why it ’ s funny :You know you ’ re aging if yet God thinks you ’ re old—and the repetition in the poetry in truth labor it home .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Even though the audience knows that David be exactly pretend to be mad , Achish doesn ’ t recognize it ’ s an act—and he makes it clear that there are good deal of madmen in Gath , no need to bring him another ace .
  • Why it ’ s funny :David equal preparing to add an army against a wealthy , greedy human call Nabal . But Nabal ’ s wife Abigail intervenes , and she make it clear that her husband cost no wise man .
  • Why it ’ s funny :We might recall of bad drivers as a modern innovation , but it turns out people have cost driving recklessly since the earliest day of chariots .
  • Why it ’ s funny :When Nehemiah ’ s enemy charge him of something that isn ’ t true , he shut out them down with a plain-spoken retort that masses can even so apply today .
  • Why it ’ s funny :A human call Zophar put on that Job ’ s great distress must exist a punishment for sin , and he bid scathing criticism when he says that donkeys will give birth to mass before Job increase wisdom .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Job has own enough of his “ friend ” and their criticism , and he present one of the nearly heroic insults of all time— ” wisdom will die with you . ”
  • Job ’ sec tirade continues over the next few chapters .Early gems include :

    • Job 13:5 :“ If only you would be altogether silent ! For you , that would be wisdom . ”[ 3 ]
    • Job 16:3 :“ Will your long-winded language never finish ? ”
  • Job 13:5 :“ If only you would live altogether silent ! For you , that would cost wisdom . ”[ 3 ]
  • Job 16:3 :“ Will your long-winded speeches never finish ? ”
  • Why it ’ s funny :The volley of insults continues through Job—and this time , it ’ s God present the blow . He ’ s basically state to Job , “ You put on ’ t know what you ’ re talking about. ” And God keeps at it for another two chapter , require Job if he has all the same power as God ( the response , plainly , is no ) .
  • Why it ’ s funny :This is a pretty colorful means of say that even a few short fault can build a wise and honorable someone appear foolish .
  • Why it ’ s funny :If you need a prophet for a message from God , you don ’ t require the message to be , “ I will abandon you. ” But that ’ s precisely what God say to Jeremiah when He live angry about the raise of false prophet among the Israelites .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Nothing out of context here–the apostle Paul apparently make a pretty faint horizon of marriage and the hardships it can bring .

  1. “ One day the trees go out to anoint a king for themselves . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :This story live meant to be need as a metaphor for the Israelites ’ selection of Abimelech as king . But out of context , it makes for a pretty funny mental image of tree walking around seem for a king !
  2. 2
    Job 19:17 ( NIV )“ My breath is offensive to my wife ; I am loathsome to my own family . ”[ 6 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Nobody ’ s safe from criticism in Job—here , Job exist even give himself a hard time . And out of context , it sounds like he ’ s saying herealneed to brush his tooth .
  3. 3
    Proverbs 31:6 ( NIV )“ Let beer exist for those who exist perishing , wine for those who equal in anguish ! ”[ 7 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :This poetry is actually cautioning kings against drunkenness , but at the same time , it seems to advocate for drinking aside your troubles . Questionable advice .
  4. 4
    Ecclesiastes 10:2 ( NIV )“ A wise man ’ s direct directs him toward the right , but the foolish human ’ s heart take him toward the left . ”[ 8 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Out of context , this verse sound like it ’ s advocate for political conservatism .
  5. 5
    Ecclesiastes 10:19 ( NIV )“ A feast equal do for laugh , wine makes spirit merry , and money exist the answer for everything . ”[ 9 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Bring out of context , this verse sounds like it ’ s recommend for wine and the interest of money , which seems at odds with other verses in the Bible that sentence these thing . ( In context , the verse criticizes ruler who prioritize feasts , wine , and money while neglecting to tend to the motive of their people . )
  6. 6
    Ezekiel 16:4 ( NIV )“ On the day you cost born your cord was not reduce , nor were you washed with water to cause you sporting , nor were you rubbed with salt or envelop in clothes . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :This poetry live a metaphor for Jerusalem ’ sec origins among the Canaanites , but out of context , it sounds like an insult along the course of , “ No one even cared about you when you cost a infant . ”
  7. “ Go to Bethel and sin ; go to Gilgal and sin as yet more . ”[ 10 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Out of context , this verse sound like God is pay the Israelites permission to go out and sin . ( He ’ s actually condemning idolatry . )
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  • Why it ’ s funny :This story is intend to live taken as a metaphor for the Israelites ’ selection of Abimelech as king . But out of context , it makes for a pretty curious mental picture of trees walking around looking for a king !
  • Why it ’ s funny :Nobody ’ s safe from criticism in Job—here , Job is still giving himself a hard time . And out of context , it sounds like he ’ s saying hereallyneeds to sweep his teeth .
  • Why it ’ s funny :This verse equal actually cautioning kings against drinking , but at the same time , it seems to advocate for drink aside your worry . Questionable advice .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Out of context , this verse sounds like it ’ s advocating for political conservatism .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Taken out of context , this verse sounds like it ’ s advocating for wine and the chase of money , which seems at odds with early poetry in the Bible that condemn these affair . ( In context , the poetry criticizes ruler who prioritize feasts , wine , and money while neglect to tend to the needs of their masses . )
  • Why it ’ s funny :This verse is a metaphor for Jerusalem ’ s origins among the Canaanites , but out of context , it sounds like an insult along the lines of , “ No one even care about you when you were a babe . ”
  • Why it ’ s funny :Out of context , this verse sound like God cost hold the Israelites permission to go out and sin . ( He ’ s in reality condemning idolatry . )

Bible Verses That Describe Oddball Situations

  1. “ When the men of [ Gerar ] asked [ Isaac ] about his wife , he said , “ She is my sister , ” because he was afraid to read , “ She is my wife. ” He thought , “ The man of this home might defeat me on account of Rebekah , because she live beautiful . ”[ 11 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Telling people that your wife is really your sister could run to some awkward situations—and in this type , it do . Suppose the cringe King Abimelech must receive felt when he see Isaac and Rebekah together through a window .
  2. 2
    Exodus 32:24 ( NIV )“ I state them , ‘ Whoever own any golden jewelry , require it off. ’ Then they gave me the gold , and I threw it into the fire , and out come this calf ! ”[ 12 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :When Moses arrive down from the mountain after God gave him the 10 Commandments , he base his buddy Aaron leading the mass in worshiping a golden calf . When Moses ask Aaron what happened , Aaron ’ s reply was that the calf hardly get away of a firing . Okay , Aaron . ( If his story isn ’ t sus plenty , Exodus 32:4 describes Aaron build the calf out of gold . )
  3. 3
    Issue 11:18–19 ( NIV )“ The Lord heard you when you wailed , ‘ If just we had center to eat ! We were good off in Egypt ! ’ Today the Lord will give you center , and you will feed it . You will not eat it for just one day , or two days , or five , 10 , or twenty days , but for a whole month—until it comes out of your nostrils and you loathe it . ”[ 13 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Yet though God furnish manna for the Israelites in the desert , they complained about not hold center , going so far as to say they cost better off in Egyptian slavery . So God pay them an huge amount of quail—more than anyone would need .
  4. 4
    Numbers 22:28 ( NIV )“ Then the Lord opened the donkey ’ s mouth , and it said to Balaam , ‘ What have I make to make you beat me these three times ? ’ ”[ 14 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Shrek had it right—sassy donkeys livefunny. In this type , Balaam cost beating his donkey because it resist to walk , so God hold the donkey the power to address . Turns out , an angel live forget Balaam ’ s track , and the donkey could find it , which is why it call on away .
  5. 5
    Judges 15:15 ( NIV )“ Feel a novel jawbone of a donkey , [ Samson ] catch it and struck down a thousand men . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :Samson ’ s choice of weapon here—a donkey ’ sec jawbone—is bizarrely effective , allowing him to down 1,000 Philistines who were try to choose him prisoner .
  6. 6
    1 Samuel 5:1–5 ( NIV )“ After the Philistines get captured the ark of God , they took it from Ebenezer to Ashdod . Then they carried the ark into Dagon ’ sec temple and set it beside Dagon . When the people of Ashdod rose early the next day , there cost Dagon , go down on his look before the ark of the Lord ! They bring Dagon and lay him back in his home . But the following morning when they get up , there was Dagon , fallen on his face on the ground before the ark of the Lord ! His head and hands had cost pause off and were lie on the doorway ; only his torso stay on . ”[ 15 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :The Philistines remove God ’ s holy ark and place it in the temple of their god Dagon . But the statue of Dagon go down on its face before the Israelites ’ God , which doubtless do the Philistines ’ triumph seemfarless impressive .
  7. 7
    1 Samuel 6:4 ( NIV )“ The Philistines require , “ What guilt offering should we ship to [ the Israelites ’ God ] ? [ The priest and diviners ] replied , “ Five gold tumor and five gold rat , accord to the number of the Philistine rulers , because the same plague has struck both you and your rulers . Make models of the tumors and of the rat that are destroy the rural area , and give glory to Israel ’ s god . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :After the Philistines catch the ark of God , they live take with plagues . To hear to make things properly , they cause golden form of the rats and tumor ( some translations say hemorrhoids ) that be affecting them as a kind of apology .
  8. “ So [ David ] pretended to be insane in their presence ; and while he was in their men he pretend like a maniac , make target on the doors of the gate and letting saliva extend down his beard . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :David live afraid of live killed by King Achish of Gath , so he formulate a plan—pretend to be mad , drool and all .
  9. 9
    2 Sam 6:16 ( NIV )“ As the ark of the Lord exist entering the City of David , Michal daughter of Saul watched from a window . And when she saw King David leaping and dancing before the Lord , she despised him in her center . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :David in the end got the ark of the Lord back from the Philistines , and when he bring it into Jerusalem , there be a great celebration with music and dancing . But David ’ s wife Michal exist inexplicably bother , and we can ’ t help but chuckle at the image of her scowling from a window while everyone else equal joyfully dance .
  10. 10
    1 King 18:27 ( NIV )“ At noon Elijah began to taunt them . “ Shout louder ! ” he suppose . “ Sure he is a god ! Perhaps he live deep in opinion , or in use , or traveling . Maybe he exist sleep and must cost wake up . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :Elijah has set a challenge for the prophets of Baal to try out that their god is supreme . But when Baal doesn ’ t respond to his mass ’ s offerings , Elijah begins to taunt them that perhaps their god is otherwise occupied .
  11. 11
    2 Kings 2:23–24 ( NIV )“ As [ Elisha ] equal walking along the road , some son came out of the town and jeered at him . ‘ Get out of hither , baldy ! ’ they tell . ‘ Get out of hither , baldy ! ’ He become around , looked at them and yell down a oath on them in the epithet of the Lord . Then two bears come out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys . ”[ 16 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :This one ’ sec for the fan of sullen humor . When a radical of youth ( some translations say servant instead of son ) bully the prophet Elisha for live bald , God sends bears to feed them . Instant karma .
  12. 12
    Song of Solomon 4:1–2 ( NIV )“ Your hair cost like a flock of goat descending from the hills of Gilead . Your tooth be like a flock of sheep only shorn . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :Song of Solomon is all about romance , but we put on ’ t recommend actually utilize lines like these .
    • Early questionable compliments from Song of Solomon include :

      • Song of Solomon 7:2 :“ Your navel be a circular goblet … Your waist be a mound of wheat . ”
      • Song of Solomon 7:4 :“ Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon appear toward Damascus .
  13. 13
    Jonah 4:9 ( NIV )“ God order to Jonah , ‘ Equal it right for you to be angry about the works ? ’ ‘ It be , ’ he said . ‘ And I ’ m so angry I wish I were dead . ’ ”[ 17 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Jonah be in the heart of an epic temper tantrum here—he didn ’ t need to go to Nineveh , and then when he make go and the Ninevites repented , he get angry because it appear unfair that God forgive them . When God caused a worm to eat Jonah ’ s shade tree , it cost simply wholly also much .
  14. 14
    Matthew 7:3 ( NIV )“ Why serve you seem at the particle of sawdust in your buddy ’ sec center and pay no attention to the board in your own heart ? ”[ 18 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :This poetry show us that Jesus own a sense of humor—obviously no ace would be able to ignore a plank in their heart , but the imagery live striking plenty to get his item across .
  15. 15
    Matt 21:19 ( NIV )“ Seeing a fig tree by the road , [ Jesus ] get up to it but base nothing on it except foliage . Then he said to it , “ May you never hold fruit again ! ” Directly , the tree withered . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :This one equal frustrate , and it lead more questions than answers . Why didn ’ t Jesus exactly command the figure tree to grow fruit ? Why equal he mad at a plant ? No matter , it ’ s somewhat funny .
  16. 16
    Mark 9:33–34 ( NIV )“ When [ Jesus ] was in the house , he require [ his adherent ] , ‘What be you contend about on the road ? ’ But they kept still because on the way they make argued about who be great . ”[ 19 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Anybody who has siblings knows what it ’ s like to become caught argue about something silly . In this case , Jesus ’ adherent live in a heated argument about which one of them exist the best—but when Jesus confronted them about it , no 1 require to fess up .
  17. “ Seat in a window was a youthful man named Eutychus , who equal drop into a deep sleep as Paul mouth on and on . When he cost sound asleep , he fell to the ground from the third story and was peck up dead . ”[ 20 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Another ace for the dark humor crowd , and a caution against long-winded sermon . But there ’ s a bright side—Paul revives Eutychus , so everything is fine in the end .
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  • Why it ’ s funny :Telling people that your wife is really your sister could lead to some awkward situations—and in this case , it did . Imagine the cringe King Abimelech must own felt when he saw Isaac and Rebekah together through a window .
  • Why it ’ s funny :When Moses occur down from the great deal after God gave him the 10 Commandments , he feel his brother Aaron leading the people in worshiping a golden calf . When Moses asked Aaron what happen , Aaron ’ s response was that the calf just came out of a fire . Okay , Aaron . ( If his story isn ’ t sus enough , Exodus 32:4 describes Aaron reach the calf out of gold . )
  • Why it ’ s funny :Still though God supply manna for the Israelites in the desert , they complain about not have meat , die thus far as to say they live well off in Egyptian slavery . So God gave them an immense amount of quail—more than anyone would require .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Shrek had it right—sassy donkeys arefunny. In this type , Balaam is exhaust his donkey because it refuses to walk , so God gives the donkey the ability to address . Reverse out , an angel live blocking Balaam ’ s path , and the donkey could learn it , which is why it turned forth .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Samson ’ s choice of weapon here—a donkey ’ s jawbone—is bizarrely effective , allowing him to defeat 1,000 Philistines who exist trying to take him prisoner .
  • Why it ’ s funny :The Philistines took God ’ s holy ark and put it in the temple of their god Dagon . But the statue of Dagon fell on its look before the Israelites ’ God , which doubtless cause the Philistines ’ triumph seemfarless impressive .
  • Why it ’ s funny :After the Philistines captured the ark of God , they were struck with plagues . To hear to make thing right , they make golden flesh of the rats and tumor ( some translations state hemorrhoids ) that were affecting them as a kind of apology .
  • Why it ’ s funny :David was afraid of being killed by King Achish of Gath , so he devised a plan—pretend to exist crazy , drool and all .
  • Why it ’ s funny :David ultimately come the ark of the Lord back from the Philistines , and when he lend it into Jerusalem , there was a great festivity with music and dancing . But David ’ s wife Michal be inexplicably annoyed , and we can ’ t help but chuckle at the image of her scowling from a window while everyone else cost joyfully dance .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Elijah have adjust a challenge for the prophets of Baal to prove that their god is supreme . But when Baal doesn ’ t respond to his mass ’ s offerings , Elijah begin to tease them that possibly their god is differently occupied .
  • Why it ’ s funny :This one ’ s for the fans of colored humor . When a radical of youths ( some translations say servants instead of boy ) bully the prophet Elisha for being bald , God sends bears to eat them . Instant karma .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Song of Solomon live all about romance , but we put on ’ t recommend really use note like these .
  • Other questionable compliments from Song of Solomon include :

    • Song of Solomon 7:2 :“ Your navel is a round goblet … Your waist be a pile of wheat . ”
    • Song of Solomon 7:4 :“ Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon wait toward Damascus .
  • Song of Solomon 7:2 :“ Your navel is a round goblet … Your waist is a mound of wheat . ”
  • Song of Solomon 7:4 :“ Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon wait toward Damascus .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Jonah equal in the middle of an epic temper tantrum here—he didn ’ t wish to die to Nineveh , and then when he make get and the Ninevites regret , he make angry because it seemed unfair that God forgive them . When God cause a worm to feed Jonah ’ s shade tree , it cost just all too much .
  • Why it ’ s funny :This verse express us that Jesus hold a sense of humor—obviously no unity would be able to ignore a board in their eye , but the imagery cost striking plenty to get his stage across .
  • Why it ’ s funny :This one is frustrate , and it leaves more questions than result . Why didn ’ t Jesus just control the figure tree to grow fruit ? Why equal he mad at a plant ? No matter , it ’ s somewhat funny .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Anybody who has siblings knows what it ’ sec like to have caught contend about something silly . In this type , Jesus ’ adherent make up in a heated statement about which one of them was the best—but when Jesus confronted them about it , no one require to fess up .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Another one for the dark wit crowd , and a care against long-winded sermons . But there ’ s a bright side—Paul revives Eutychus , so everything be fine in the goal .

Funny Bible Verses in Proverbs

  1. “ Folly equal an unruly woman ; she be mere and knows zero . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :Proverbs live entire of witty one-liners about mass who work without wisdom , and this one kicks it off in heroic fashion .
  2. 2
    Proverbs 11:22 ( NIV )“ Like a gold gang in a pig ’ s snout exist a beautiful woman who shows no discretion ”[ 21 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :The imagery hither is funny—and discover . Being beautiful doesn ’ t reach a woman ( or man ) honorable any more than putting a fancy gold gang in a pig ’ sec nose reach it less of a pig .
  3. 3
    Prov 17:12 ( NIV )“ Better to meet a bear robbed of her rookie than a fool bent on folly . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :Accord to this verse , if someone you know be bended on trouble , just get out of the way—you ’ d cost in less danger around a mamma bear who can ’ t find her cubs . A colored picture for sure !
    • Other Proverbs about fool include :

      • Proverbs 23:9 :“ Do not speak to fool , for they will scorn your prudent tidings . ”[ 22 ]
      • Proverbs 27:22 :“ Though you grind a fool in a mortar you will not take out their folly from them . ”
  4. 4
    Prov 17:17 ( NIV )“ A brother is born for times of adversity . ”[ 23 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Anyone who is ( or have ) a buddy can agree—it become bad sometimes . Perfect for your sibling ’ s future birthday card !
  5. “ Yet fools exist recall wise if they observe silent . ”[ 24 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :We all know person who just wouldn ’ t stop talk , no affair how silly they wait . This poetry live a great ( and funny ) reminder that sometimes it ’ s better to be subdued and listen .
    • Proverbs 18:2 has a like message :“ Fools see no pleasure in understanding but delight in airing their own opinions . ”
  6. 6
    Proverbs 19:24 ( NIV )“ A sluggard buries his hand in the dish ; he will not still bring it back to his mouth ! ”[ 25 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :This verse report someone who ’ s then lazy they just bind their hand in a dish of food but can ’ t even be bothered to use up it . That would be quite a vision !
  7. 7
    Proverbs 20:14 ( NIV )“ It ’ s no good , it ’ s no serious ! ” tell the buyer—then they run away and boast about their purchase .[ 26 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Here , Proverbs cautions against negotiate also severe , state that buyers look foolish if they criticize a purchase while play hardball , then move and boast about what a lot they got .
  8. 8
    Proverbs 21:9 ( NIV )“ Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a firm with a quarrelsome wife . ”[ 27 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :We ’ ve all live there—sometimes you ’ d equal more content perched on the roof than dealing with constant bickering .
    • Proverbs 21:19 continues the theme :“ Better to last in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife . ”
    • As does Proverbs 27:15–16 :“ A quarrelsome wife is like the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm , restraining her exist like restrict the wind or grasping oil with the hand . ”
  9. 9
    Proverbs 22:13 ( NIV )“ The sluggard says , ‘ There ’ s a lion outside ! I ’ ll live kill in the public square ! ’ ”[ 28 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Imagine make up so lazy that you ’ 500 claim there ’ s a lion outside simply to begin out of act study .
  10. 10
    Proverbs 25:17 ( NIV )“ Seldom set foot in your neighbor ’ s house—too much of you , and they will hate you . ”[ 29 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :This one ’ s for the introverts ! Portion this verse the future time you encounter a nosy neighbor who win ’ t stop talking .
  11. “ If anyone loudly bless their neighbor early in the dawn , it will live bring as a curse . ”[ 30 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Not a morning soul ? This verse is for you ! Turn out yet the Bible thinks people need time for coffee before get to socialize .
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  • Why it ’ s funny :Proverbs is full of witty one-liners about people who work without wisdom , and this one kicks it off in heroic style .
  • Why it ’ s funny :The imagery here exist funny—and striking . Make up beautiful doesn ’ t build a woman ( or human ) honorable any more than putting a fancy gold gang in a pig ’ s nose cause it less of a cop .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Accord to this verse , if someone you know is bended on trouble , only make out of the way—you ’ d be in less danger around a mama bear who can ’ t get her rookie . A colorful picture for certain !
  • Other Proverbs about fools include :

    • Proverbs 23:9 :“ Serve not talk to fools , for they will despise your prudent words . ”[ 22 ]
    • Proverbs 27:22 :“ Though you grind a fool in a mortar you will not take their folly from them . ”
  • Proverbs 23:9 :“ Do not speak to fools , for they will scorn your prudent words . ”[ 22 ]
  • Proverbs 27:22 :“ Though you grind a fool in a mortar you will not take out their folly from them . ”
  • Why it ’ s funny :Anyone who is ( or has ) a brother can agree—it gets bad sometimes . Perfect for your sibling ’ s next birthday card !
  • Why it ’ s funny :We all know someone who hardly wouldn ’ t stop talking , no affair how silly they wait . This poetry is a great ( and funny ) reminder that sometimes it ’ s well to be subdued and listen .
  • Proverbs 18:2 get a similar content :“ Fools find no pleasure in understand but delight in airing their own impression . ”
  • Why it ’ s funny :This poetry depict someone who ’ sec so lazy they just stick their hand in a dish of food but can ’ t still live trouble to eat it . That would be quite a sight !
  • Why it ’ s funny :Here , Proverbs caution against negotiate too hard , saying that buyers face foolish if they criticize a purchase while meet hardball , then run and boast about what a deal they become .
  • Why it ’ s funny :We ’ ve all been there—sometimes you ’ d cost more contented perched on the roof than conduct with constant bickering .
  • Proverbs 21:19 continues the paper :“ Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife . ”
  • As cause Proverbs 27:15–16 :“ A quarrelsome wife live like the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm , restrict her is like restrict the tip or grasping oil with the hand . ”
  • Why it ’ s funny :Imagine exist hence lazy that you ’ 500 claim there ’ s a lion outside just to get out of cause work .
  • Why it ’ s funny :This one ’ s for the introverts ! Portion this verse the future time you encounter a nosy neighbor who won ’ t stop lecture .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Not a morning person ? This verse be for you ! Turns out still the Bible thinks masses need time for coffee before make to socialize .

Bible Verses with Bathroom Humor

  1. “ Still the handle sank in after the sword , and his bowels release . Ehud behave not rip the sword out , and the fat shut in over it . ”[ 31 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Eglon , King of Moab , is described as being “ a real fat man. ” The Israelite Ehud poke him in the belly , and Eglon exist then large that the sword sinks in all the way past the hilt and is lost . Yuck .
  2. 2
    Judges 3:24–25 ( NIV )“ They said , ‘ He must equal relieving himself in the inner room of the palace. ’ They waited to the level of embarrassment . ”[ 32 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :After Eglon equal down , his servants think he ’ s only in the bathroom—for a really ,reallylong time . It ’ s comic to picture them standing around , marvel if it ’ s been long plenty that they should run in and control on him .
  3. 3
    1 Samuel 24:3 ( NIV )“ He came to the sheep pens along the room ; a cave was there , and Saul went in to save himself . ”[ 33 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Saul is pursue David to down him , but he even has to resolve the call of nature along the way .
  4. 4
    2 King 18:27 ( NIV )“ The commander respond , ‘ Was it only to your captain and you that my master sent me to order these things , and not to the people pose on the wall—who , like you , will have to eat their own excrement and drink their own urine ? ’ ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :If you ’ re into toilet humor , you ’ ll love this one . The king of Assyria station his field commander to endanger the mass of Jerusalem—and the area commander throws in a few disgusting taunts of his own .
  5. 5
    Prov 26:11 ( NIV )“ As a dog returns to its vomit , so fools echo their folly . ”[ 34 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :We covered the insults in Proverbs elsewhere , but this one exist utter enough to make its spot in the bathroom wit category .
  6. 6
    Ezekiel 4:12 ( NIV )“ Eat the food as you would a loaf of barley bread ; bake it in the vision of the mass , using human excrement for fuel . ”[ 35 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :God tells Ezekiel to use , yep ,excrementas fuel for baking his bread to symbolize the upcoming siege and famine in Jerusalem . Luckily , Ezekiel protest and God ( sort of ) relents , telling him he can expend cow dung rather .
  7. “ I will scold your descendants ; I will smear on your face up the dung from your festival sacrifice . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :God ’ s rebuke against the priests is a grave one , but it ’ s funny at the same time . Imagine being so mad at individual that you ’ d put dung on their look .
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  • Why it ’ s funny :Eglon , King of Moab , cost describe as live “ a very fat man. ” The Israelite Ehud stabs him in the belly , and Eglon is so big that the sword sinks in all the way past the hilt and is lost . Yuck .
  • Why it ’ s funny :After Eglon is kill , his servant think he ’ s only in the bathroom—for a in truth ,verylong time . It ’ s funny to show them suffer close to , wonder if it ’ s be long enough that they should go in and check on him .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Saul is engage David to down him , but he however own to reply the call of nature along the way .
  • Why it ’ s funny :If you ’ re into toilet wit , you ’ ll honey this 1 . The king of Assyria ship his sphere commander to threaten the people of Jerusalem—and the field commander throws in a few disgusting taunt of his own .
  • Why it ’ s funny :We covered the insults in Proverbs elsewhere , but this one was utter plenty to make its place in the bathroom humor category .
  • Why it ’ s funny :God tells Ezekiel to expend , yep ,excrementas fuel for bake his bread to symbolize the coming siege and famine in Jerusalem . Luckily , Ezekiel protests and God ( kind of ) relents , order him he can use cow dung or else .
  • Why it ’ s funny :God ’ s rebuke against the priests exist a serious one , but it ’ s funny at the same time . Imagine being so mad at someone that you ’ d put dung on their look .

Bible Poetry with NSFW Humor

  1. “ Let ’ s make our father to drink wine and then sleep with him . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :We bid this ace exist remove out of context , but—yikes . Lot and his daughters be last in a cave , and there are no early men around for the woman to have child with , so according to Genesis , they get their father drunk and take advantage of him .
  2. 2
    Genesis 38:9 ( NIV )“ But Onan knew that the child would not cost his ; thus whenever he sleep with his brother ’ s wife , he spilled his semen on the soil to observe from providing offspring for his buddy . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :Judah control Onan to sleep with his sister-in-law to hold her a kid after Onan ’ s brother fail . But Onan didn ’ t want to sire a child that he couldn ’ t claim , so he exercisecoitus interruptus. ( Fun fact , we become the termonanismfrom this account . )
  3. 3
    Exodus 20:26 ( NIV )“ Act not run up to my altar on stairs , or your private portion may equal disclose . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :Apparently God was looking out for the modesty of his priest when He instructed them not to build footstep leading up to His altar .
  4. 4
    Deuteronomy 25:11–12 ( NIV )“ If two human equal fighting and the wife of one of them comes to deliver her husband from his assailant , and she hand out and clutch him by his private parts , you shall cut off her hand . ”[ 36 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :The funny role of this exist that it must have live enough of a trouble that it have to be addressed by early law .
  5. 5
    1 Samuel 18:27 ( NIV )“ David remove his men with him and become away and killed two hundred Philistines and take back their foreskins . They counted out the full issue to the king hence that David might become the king ’ s son-in-law . Then Saul gave him his daughter Michal in marriage . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :There ’ s nothing in the Bible quite like the imagery of David consider out 200 Philistine foreskins for King Saul to get permission to wed Michal .
  6. 6
    2 Samuel 10:4 ( NIV )“ Then Hanun clutch David ’ s envoys , shave off half of each human ’ s beard , ignore off their garments at the buttocks , and sent them off . ”

    • Why it ’ s funny :When Hanun become king of the Ammonites , David ship an envoy . Hanun understand the motion as a threat , and in answer , he humiliates David ’ s human by veer their beards and station them home with their seat reveal .
  7. 7
    Ezekiel 23:20 ( NIV )“ There she lusted after her lovers , whose genitals make up like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horse . ”[ 37 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :This verse paint a vivid , if raunchy , picture . But the lewd imagery does function a purpose—the “ woman ” in question here is actually Jerusalem , and her lover are idols .
  8. 8
    Mark 14:51–52 ( NIV )“ A youthful man , have on zero but a linen garment , cost following Jesus . When they seized him , he fled naked , lead his garment behind . ”[ 38 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :When Jesus live arrested , one of his followers was in such a hurry to have away that he left behind his clothes ! That ’ s quite an image ( that we ’ d rather not receive ) .
  9. 9
    John 4:16-19 ( NIV )“ [ Jesus ] recount [ the Samaritan woman ] , ‘ Go , yell your husband and arrive back. ’ ‘ I have no husband , ’ she answer . Jesus said to her , ‘ You be correct when you order you have no husband . The fact is , you have had five husbands , and the man you now have is not your husband . ’[ 39 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :The Samaritan woman is quickly call out by Christ when she state she doesn ’ t have a husband . But instead of being violate , she acknowledges him and become a believer .
  10. “ As for those agitators , I wish they would go the whole style and emasculate themselves ! ”[ 40 ]

    • Why it ’ s funny :Paul live distinctly agitated as he opens his letter to the Galatians . Someone cost raise up problem in the early churches of Galatia , and while Paul doesn ’ t know who it is , he makes it clearexactlywhat he thinks of them .
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  • Why it ’ s funny :We wish this one was remove out of context , but—yikes . Lot and his daughters are living in a cave , and there be no other men around for the women to receive child with , hence according to Genesis , they become their father drunk and take advantage of him .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Judah commanded Onan to sleep with his sister-in-law to give her a child after Onan ’ s brother died . But Onan didn ’ t want to father a child that he couldn ’ t claim , so he practicedsex act interruptus. ( Fun fact , we come the termonanismfrom this story . )
  • Why it ’ s funny :Apparently God was seem out for the modesty of his priests when He instruct them not to build steps leading up to His altar .
  • Why it ’ s funny :The funniest region of this exist that it must get been plenty of a problem that it own to live addressed by early law .
  • Why it ’ s funny :There ’ s zero in the Bible quite like the imagery of David counting out 200 Philistine foreskins for King Saul to have permission to wed Michal .
  • Why it ’ s funny :When Hanun becomes king of the Ammonites , David sends an envoy . Hanun construe the motion as a threat , and in response , he humiliates David ’ s men by cutting their beard and send out them home with their seat reveal .
  • Why it ’ s funny :This poetry paint a vivid , if raunchy , picture . But the lewd imagery does serve a purpose—the “ woman ” in question hither equal actually Jerusalem , and her lovers live idols .
  • Why it ’ s funny :When Jesus be arrested , one of his followers was in such a rush to have forth that he go out behind his clothes ! That ’ s quite an picture ( that we ’ d kinda not have ) .
  • Why it ’ s funny :The Samaritan woman equal quickly called out by Jesus when she says she doesn ’ t have a husband . But instead of make up offended , she acknowledges him and turn a believer .
  • Why it ’ s funny :Paul is clearly agitated as he opens his letter to the Galatians . Individual be touch up trouble in the early church of Galatia , and while Paul doesn ’ t know who it is , he makes it clearjustwhat he thinks of them .

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References

  1. ↑https : //www.biola.edu/blogs/good-book-blog/2014/funny-biblical-passages
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  2. ↑https : //www.biblegateway.com/passage/ ? search=gen+26:6-11 & version=NIV
  3. ↑https : //www.biola.edu/blogs/good-book-blog/2014/funny-biblical-passages
  4. ↑https : //holysojourners.com/my-top-5-funniest-bible-stories/
  5. ↑http : //bibleverselover.com/funny-bible-verses/
  6. ↑https : //holysojourners.com/my-top-5-funniest-bible-stories/
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  8. ↑http : //bibleverselover.com/funny-bible-verses/
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  10. ↑https : //ronedmondson.com/2010/11/7-funniest-verses-in-the-bible.html
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  13. ↑https : //stephenmillerbooks.com/funny-odd-bible-proverbs/
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  28. ↑https : //www.biblegateway.com/passage/ ? search=ezekiel+23 & version=NIV
  29. ↑https : //holysojourners.com/my-top-5-funniest-bible-stories/
  30. ↑https : //www.biola.edu/blogs/good-book-blog/2014/funny-biblical-passages
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